This past week-end, all around the globe, we celebrated mothers. All over the airwaves, we have heard teary paeans to the glory of motherhood. We have sung "sweet mother” and other such emotional songs. There have been dinners. We have recounted favorite stories. 

 Mothers are not just those who have physically given birth. They are all those who have mothered others, young and old. Indeed, quite a number of those who have given birth are not really mothers while many who have never given birth are excellent mothers. We know from our life experiences that there are women, who though not our biological parents have meant more to us, sometimes than our mothers.

Even adults need mothers. I can confess that this week-end, as the airwaves filled with talk of mothers, I missed my mother. Even though she has long departed to join her ancestors, her spirit is with me.
She is the illiterate woman who was implacably committed to educating her children--- all six of us, because she knew that education would open for us the doors of opportunity.

She was, also for me, a father of sorts because I never met my father. I remember the day she found out that I was trying to look for my father. She cried because she felt she had failed me as a mother! Oh, such love. Such pure love. She taught me about candour and standing by my convictions. “Son,” she would say, “if what you are saying about someone is important enough, tell him yourself. If it is not, then maybe you should not be saying it.”

She taught me generosity. Whenever she was home and cooking, she cooked big because “an obaatan should not cook and leave any child around hungry.” Despite how great she was, she could not have mothered me all by herself.

I recall all the great female teachers who were like mothers to me.
Ms. Adubofour of TAPASS.
Ms. Bodom of OKESS.
Prof. Duane of University of Toronto .
They all in their own way looked out for me the way my mother would have done if she had been around. I remember the last time I saw Prof. Duane. After two very hard years of struggle, I had managed to right my Medical education following the abrupt interruption of my medical education by politics.

Over those two years, she had given me a lot of encouragement and marveled at my perseverance. On this last day, I had gone to say goodbye before leaving for my Residency training in the United States . She was generally a woman of very few words but that day, she could not control her emotions. “You know I am retiring this year?” “No, Madam” I replied. “Well, I am. Let me tell you something. I have taught for twenty-five years here and I have never met a more remarkable student. Come and give me a hug, son.” Then she got up and gave me a long hug.  

Just as I got to the door, she said “Son, treat your patients well and never let your success get to your head. And by the way, I have just been diagnosed with breast cancer so pray for me.” As I walked out, I had tears in my eyes and I knew that in that office, she was crying too.

Then I remember professionally, the many women who have taken me under their wings and helped adjust to new environments, whether in politics or Medicine. The mothers are everywhere. 

 In my own family, I have watched my wife, Evelyn show so much unconditional love to my boys as they grow up. When she is around, my boys just feel better and I pray that she will be around for a long time to mother them and me too. Even from so far away, she is such a presence in our lives.

For the rest of us, let us celebrate our women while they are with us. Indeed, while they are our mothers, they are also our sisters and our spouses.
 When it is mothers' day, we should celebrate all of them. We should take up the causes of women because whatever we do for our women, we do for our mothers.

Let us oppose domestic violence so that they can feel secure in our homes. It is wrong for men to beat and abuse in other ways, the very women we honour as our mothers.
   Let us support property rights for our widows so that when we too are gone, our spouses, who are our childrens' mothers, can have the right to inherit the properties that they help their spouses to acquire.

Let us support girl-child education so that our future mothers will be prepared for the challenges of the future. As Aggrey put it so perceptively, “if you educate a man, you educate an individual but if you educate a woman, you educate a family.” We should educate our girls so that we can have the assurance that our families will have as anchors, educated women. 

 Let us support healthcare in general and safe deliveries in particular so that our women can deliver our children safely. The toll that death and disability take on our women, here in Africa annually is a disgrace. It is a measure of our civilization.

Let us extend micro-credit facilities to our women so that they can take care of their families. They have shown that more often than not, they take care of money and assets better than men do.

Let us put more women in positions of responsibility so that they can see in our governments, more of their faces. History has clearly demonstrated that women, just like men, are capable of great leadership. Names like Margaret Thatcher, Indira Gandhi and Johnson Sirleaf bear testimony to how much women can do in the right circumstances.

Ultimately, however, no matter how much enlightened men do to advance the cause of women, women can and must stand up for themselves.

Women must strive to educate their daughters so that those daughters will be leaders in law, medicine, education and in the corporate boardrooms.

They must seek justice in our courts against the oppressive system of inheritance that deprives them unjustly of their properties.

They must leave relationships with abusive men that degrades them and dishonours their womanhood.

They must use their thumbs to send more of their own into office instead of relying on the opportunistic promises of politicians for their advancement.

As they do these things with our support, our nation will be stronger for it. Those who see the struggle for their advancement as a struggle between men and women are mistaken. It is a struggle of men with women, against our true enemies, hunger, disease, poverty and injustice. As Henry Kissinger once said “The battle of the sexes will never be won because there is too much fraternizing with the enemy on both sides.”

Whatever we do, however, we must while being aggressively affirmative, shun quotas. Women must advance, just like men, not because they are women, but in spite of being women.

Let us move forward, men and women, together, in faith, to build a better Ghana .